How a Homeschool Crisis Restored My Sanity

A couple of years ago I had a panic attack about homeschooling. A storm of uncertainty and despair rained down on me. Doubts began to take over my thoughts. Fear began to paralyze me.

“Will my children be prepared for college?”

 “What if they don’t go to college will they be prepared for that possibility?”

 “What if I forget to teach them something they needed to know and it ruins their life?”

“What if we should be studying Chinese like that other homeschool family is?”

“Should I add five more subjects to our day? It seems like we do too little.”

“Should I get rid of some subjects? Our day seems too long.”

Doubts and fear about our homeschool led me to look for new curriculum, imitating other homeschoolers, defaulting to a public school mindset, and questioning everything as not good enough.


Finally I couldn’t take it anymore; this line of thinking was driving me insane. Like a dog chasing its tail or a cork bobbing on the water, I had no direction for our homeschool. I had no clear cut goals. I had nothing to direct our studies except external curriculum and comparisons to what others were doing. What do I do now?

I found my answer in my Bible reading one morning:
…for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind.  For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways. (James 1:6b-8)

In front of me, in black and white, was exactly the problem with our homeschool. I had doubts about what I was doing and if I was capable of doing it. I was being driven and tossed about by every new wind of homeschooling that came along. I was double-minded. I was unstable. And because of this there was no way our homeschool would receive any blessing from the Lord. The Lord can’t work with wishy-washy. He can’t work with doubt.

The need to restore sanity and peace to my mind and our homeschool forced me to my knees in prayer and to develop a goal for my children’s education. Goal-setting has been the single, best thing I’ve ever done for our homescool. No matter the path we take in our homeschool, I know the treasure that I want waiting at the end. Making goals allows me to focus everything we do, to test and see if our routine, curriculum, extra curricular activities all support and further the goals I’ve made for our homeschool. God can work with goals. He can thrive with direction. He can bless that type of homeschool.

When I spent time meditating on the end goal, I developed three main goals that would drive all that we did. If I achieve these three things with my children, I will consider myself a success.

Love God and Love Others

There’s a reason Jesus said this was the Cliff’s Notes version of the Bible. In all that I do I try to think about how I can help my children to love God and love other people more and more. Love, kindness, patience, gentleness are much needed in our world. I want my children to be the next generation to pass that on to others while growing in their own love and relationship with God. I want them to know the Bible so they can know and love Him. I want them to be exposed and interact with as many different races, cultures, and ideologies as possible so they can know and love their fellow man who are made in His image.

Know How to Learn

I think a lot of homeschool parents panic about making sure their children know everything they need to know. In all honesty, this is a crazy goal. No one knows everything they need to know at 18 when they graduate high school. In fact, it’s laughable if you think about it. My fears and doubts that my children might not know something they need is completely true. They WILL ABSOLUTELY come across things they need to know that they do not. I did. You did. Everyone who has every lived has done so. The key is make sure they know HOW to learn, HOW to find information, HOW to understand that information, and HOW to connect the dots to previous information. That is a skill that is much more doable and beneficial.

Be Effective Communicators

Whatever job, profession, or calling our children have they will need to be able to communicate with someone about something. All of my kids have vastly different goals for what they want to do with their lives {a firefighter, a mommy, and a preschool teacher}, but all of their plans require communication. I want my children to be good, concise writers as well as someone who can speak well to a group of people. I want them to be able to communicate their feelings and needs to friends and family seasoned with love and respect.

Those are my Big Three as I call them. The three goals that drive all of our homeschool decisions and curriculum choices. I have direction now. I can look at new curriculum or another homeschool parent’s choices and decide if that will help me achieve my Big Three for my children. If the answer is yes, I look a little closer. If the answer is no, I can walk away without feeling anxiety or worry. I don’t feel out of control or like I’m stuck on a roller coaster of insanity anymore.

Now it’s your turn. Take some time to really think about what your children would look like and be like if your homeschool is a success. Write those goals down. You may have three, four, five or just one or two. Use those goals to bring peace and sanity to your thoughts. When doubt or fear creeps in, read your goals and remember the prize that waits at the end; don’t be swayed.

Be sure and see some other ways that iHomeschool Network bloggers have kept their sanity by making goals, not just homeschool goals either!


Focusing on the Big Three with my little three in the tree house,



  1. I love your big three! I find it so easy to get overwhelmed and start doubting`s such a good idea to narrow down your focus so you know where to focus your energy. Thanks for sharing!

    1. You're very welcome! Thanks for stopping by!

  2. I know this was from a few years ago, but it encouraged me just the same. Thanks so much